Tesla’s fourth ‘Master Plan’ reads like LLM-generated nonsense

Summary

Tesla has published its fourth so-called “Master Plan,” and at a high level it is about how the company wants to lead the charge into planet-wide adoption of humanoid robots and sustainable energy. But the post lacks an important building block of plans: specifics. Even CEO Elon Musk agrees. In one of his only posts about the plan since it was published on Monday — sandwiched in between a steady stream of transphobia and immigration panic — he agreed it was fair to criticize the lack of specifics, and said the company will add more. Who knows when that will happen? But right now, unlike the preceding master plan posts, this one is gauzy, generic, and reads like someone threw talking points from Musk and the “Abundance bros” into ChatGPT and published the result. (If it was Grok, it’s one of the most benign posts that AI chatbot has ever generated.) The post is stuffed with sentences that sound like a kid imitating college-level discourse, such as: “The hallmark of meritocracy is creating opportunities that enable each person to use their skills to accomplish whatever they imagine.” Why be so vague? Maybe it’s because Tesla has still not completed all of its goals from the second master plan, published all the way back in 2016, or its third, in 2023. That second plan was also about taking huge swings, but it was specific in its ambitions. First, Musk wrote that Tesla would “create a smoothly integrated and beautiful solar-roof-with-battery product that just works” and “scale that throughout the world.” Tesla has a solar roof product, but it has been plagued by problems, redesigned multiple times, and has not reached any real scale in the U.S., let alone around the world. Techcrunch event San Francisco | October 27-29, 2025 (Musk used this part of Master Plan 2 to justify Tesla’s recent offer to acquire SolarCity, a struggling company run by his cousins. Tesla spent years in court defending the acquisition, and ultimately prevailed.) On the vehicle side, Musk promised...