Why I don't discuss politics with friends

Summary

Update: There is something poetic about this essay on tribalism getting removed from users abusing the flagging system (then restored) after hitting #3 on Hacker News 😆March 2025For as much as I enjoy analyzing politics[1], I'm even more against discussing it with friends. This policy arose from three patterns observed over the years:Most people don't have political views, they have political tribesDeveloping the political reasoning skills to graduate from tribes to views is incredibly difficultand the kicker:Most people don't want to graduate from tribes to viewsOften when someone asks "who did you vote for", what they're actually doing is verifying your adherence to group culture, like a congregation member asking "you believe in god, right?" loudly in church.The insidious nature of this question comes from the false representation as earnest, intellectual discourse. Many who ask it may truly believe they’re engaging earnestly, but their responses quickly reveal an angle more akin to religious police.Most vulnerable to this behavior are the intellectually honest + socially clueless, who engage in good faith, unaware of the pending social ambush.Why does this happen?I think there are two main reasons, the first being the sheer intellectual difficulty of crafting an informed political view leads people to tribalism out of convenience.Being informed is toughTo have an informed view on any given issue, one needs to:understand economics, game theory, philosophy, sales, business, military strategy, geopolitics, sociology, history, and morebe able to understand and empathize with the various (and often opposing) groups involved in a topicdetect and ignore their own biasHow can you prioritize limited resources with deadly consequences without understanding utilitarianism vs deontology (i.e. the trolly problem)?Understand China-US relations without understanding communism vs capitalism, the fear of tyranny vs the threat of invasion, or how and where computer chips are made...